Over the last couple of weeks, Mr. Scrummy and I have somehow got ourselves addicted to old Seinfeld reruns. A family member mentioned it, we watched one episode soon after and then before we knew it we were totally hooked. At first, having never seen even one episode of Seinfeld before, I wasn’t so keen. The first episode we watched (‘The Hamptons’, if you were ever a Seinfeld fan) seemed full of dated and, frankly, quite sexist, almost slapstick-style jokes. But I thought I’d give it a chance and watch a couple more episodes and then … bam, just can’t stop watching them now. My favourite character is Elaine. She’s so honest, fun and feisty!
So as I particularly enjoyed last night’s episode, and as it began with a food theme, I thought I’d share the first few exchanges of the script with you. Just in case you don’t know, Jerry Seinfeld is a comedian and the show always starts and ends with him on stage telling jokes. So here goes:
JERRY: You know, I tell ya, I gotta say that I’m enjoying adulthood. For a lot of reasons. And, I’ll tell you reason number one: as an adult, if I want a cookie, I have a cookie, okay? I have three cookies or four cookies, or eleven cookies if I want. Many times I will intentionally ruin my entire appetite. Just ruin it. And then, I call my mother up right after to tell her that I did it. “Hello, Mom? Yeah, I just ruined my entire appetite … cookies.” See, because as an adult, we understand that even if you ruin an appetite, there’s another appetite coming right behind it. There’s no danger in running out of appetites. I’ve got millions of them, I’ll ruin them whenever I want!
Now as I have a tendency to do this before dinner with things like chips and dips and crumpets and biscuits, I thought it’d be a great idea to come up with a healthier pre-dinner snack. Yes, I’ll probably still ruin my appetite on occasion because I just didn’t have enough self-control to wait until dinner, but at least it’ll be ruined by something super wholesome like these 5-ingredient raw chocolate orange bars. I discovered some bars very similar to this in the supermarket a while ago and ever since have been meaning to attempt to re-create them at home. Although I say it myself, I seem to have got them right first time!
There are only five ingredients in these bars (I know, the name gave that one away) … dates, raw cashew nuts, sultanas, raw cacao powder and the zest and juice of one orange. They are also ridiculously easy to make, requiring just a few minutes of whizzing up in a food processor.
So that’s the fabulous thing about these, but the miraculous thing is that they taste like the sweetest, most decadent dessert – like an extra gooey brownie or even soft chocolaty toffee or fudge – all with a fairly intense hit of orange flavour. You would never in a zillion years guess that there is NO refined sugar, chocolate, butter or oil in them. Just pure goodness. And they are even gluten free. Great news, no?
So next time I get a pre-dinner snack attack, I’m going to reach for one of these and feel all smug – even if I can’t eat my dinner afterwards! 😉
5-ingredient raw chocolate orange bars
Ingredients (UK/Australia? Click below for grams/ml)
- 1 orange juiced and zested
- 6 ounces pitted dates
- 2/3 cup raw cashew nuts
- 1/3 cup raisins or sultanas I used raisins
- 2 tablespoons raw cacao powder
Instructions
- Line a fairly small square baking tin (I had 8x8 inch) with baking paper and set aside.
- Put the dates in a small bowl and pour half of the orange juice over them. Put aside for a moment.
- Put the cashews and the rest of the orange juice in your food processor and process until they are all mashed up and clump together in a ball (this took quite a while – at least 2 or 3 minutes).
- Tip the cashew and orange mixture into a bowl. Then tip the dates/orange juice and sultanas into the food processor and process for a short while until they too are all mashed up and form a sticky ball (this won’t take as long as the cashews).
- Add the mashed up dates/sultanas to the cashew/orange mixture in the bowl, then add the cacao and orange zest and mash everything together well until it resembles a thick chocolate cake batter.
- Tip the mixture into the baking tin and spread out and press down until it’s evenly pressed in and smooth.
- Cover and put in the fridge or freezer to harden a little, then cut into 8 to 10 bars (I cut mine into 8, but that makes fairly large bars).
Notes
Nutrition
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Allison says
Helen! I really enjoy a good Seinfeld rerun. I also love Elaine––She’s hilarious!
The combo of orange and chocolate is new to me in a raw bar like this. Brilliant idea!!!! Seems every holiday appropriate too!
Helen says
Thanks, Allison … glad you like it! I had one of these this morning for my morning snack, and was very tempted to have another one just now – managed to resist, though! (you know, too much of a good thing and all that …) Now I’m off to watch another Seinfeld 😉
Gayle @ Pumpkin 'N Spice says
Seinfield is a classic show! I’m not big into it, but every once in a whole, I’ll watch a rerun. These raw chocolate bars look incredible, Helen! I’ve never seen anything quite like this. I absolutely love the orange flavor! Such a great treat when you want a chocolate fix.
Helen says
Aw, so glad you like these, Gayle! They really do taste very chocolaty, so I hope you give them or something like them a try some time. They’re my favourite snack at the moment!
ATasteOfMadness says
Wow, this looks amazing! I have some oranges in the fridge.. I should really make something with them!
Helen says
Hello! Oh, do have a go at making these bars – you’ll love them!
Shashi @ runninsrilankan says
Haha – love your segway of incorporating Elaine’s cookie love into these healthy bars! With these bars there’s no chance of ruining my appetite – only problem with these bars is not being able to hold onto them long enough! I so adore the combo of dates, raisins and cashews – combining them with cacao is just plain brilliant and oh so decadent!
Helen says
Hi, Shashi! So glad you approve of my Seinfeld ‘trick’ to introduce these bars. This was my first attempt at something like this and I’ve been scoffing one every morning as a snack (to stop me eating cookies instead!) 🙂
Marcie says
I love the flavors of chocolate and orange, Helen –these bars would be so great for snacks and breakfast! And Seinfeld reruns sound like fun! I miss that show.
Helen says
Hi, Marcie! So glad you like these – it’s the choc orange combo that makes it for me. Everyone seems to love Seinfeld and yet I’ve only just discovered it – better late than never, though! 🙂
Kathleen | hapanom says
I love Seinfield! There are so many times in even daily life that remind me of something that happened on that show! Granted – on Seinfeld it’s more extreme and taken to a hilarious level – but really, life is can be hilarious, right!?
Amazing recipe! I’m a huge fan of chocolate and orange! And how cool that its raw! I’ve never tried that before – but will have remedy that!
Helen says
Hi, Kathleen! It’s ridiculous that I’ve only just jumped on the Seinfeld bandwagon, isn’t it (only 10 years or so late … haha! I get there in the end though, it seems!) I love the choc-orange combo, too. I’ve just decided today too that these taste a little like Christmas cake – except a gooey, even more decadent version. I’m sitting here feeling very smug though that they are so healthy. So glad you like them!
Alyssa @ My Sequined Life says
I love Seinfeld!! My parents were huge huge huge fans when it was first on TV so I grew up with Seinfeld quotes. Now I always seem to catch reruns on TV and feel like I know the episodes already because I’ve heard the quotes a million times haha These bars are fabulous!!! Chocolate orange anything is a favorite and I love how simple these are.
Helen says
Ahhh … you must have super cool parents, Alyssa! That’s so funny that you feel like you’ve already watched them … haha! My husband is always quoting lines from TV shows (mostly old British comedy, some of which was so hilarious), so now I think he’s going to add this to his ‘repetoire’!!
cheri says
Hi Helen, these bars are a beautiful thing, love them. Every once in a while I’ll go crazy and eat cookies for breakfast. We used to watch Seinfeld, I remember the phones were like a foot long.
Helen says
Hi, Cheri! Thanks so much for ‘liking’ these! I think that’s wonderful to eat something ‘naughty’ for breakfast every now and again – especially at weekends!
P.S. I’ll have to keep an eye out for those foot-long phones on Seinfeld! 🙂
Allie | Baking a Moment says
Wow these sound amazing Helen!
Helen says
Thanks, Allie 🙂
Cindy @ Pick Fresh Foods says
We love Seinfeld! We received a DVD collection and have watched every single one. We never get tired of seeing the same one over and over. It is so funny and a lot of their lines stick with you. 😀
These bars look delicious! I love the flavor combination and how easy they are to make.
Helen says
I’m thinking that I’d quite like that collection, Cindy! There are so many great one-liners in that show. So happy you like the bars and hope you give something like this a go some day!
Mira says
I love these! Chocolate and orange is a great combination and you’v done a great job creating this healthy recipe! I will definitely try them!
I like Seinfeld, but haven’t watched the show in a while. It is funny!
Helen says
Hi, Mira! Choc orange is one of my favourite flavour combos – so glad you like it, too! I hope you do try them some time soon 🙂
Annie @Maebells says
Oh I love easy grab and go recipes like this! Looks great!
Helen says
Thanks, Annie … you’re right, these are totally grab and go. I have a stash in my freezer right now which are coming in ‘very handy’ come mid morning when I’m feeling a bit peckish!
Caralyn @ glutenfreehappytummy says
oh seinfeld 🙂 and wow these bars look incredible!
Helen says
Hi, Caralyn … so happy you like these! (oh, and thanks so much for passing by!)
[email protected] Eats says
Mrs Scrummy, I have to say I have seen sugarless chocolates bars/balls before but I have never been tempted however, I trust your taste so if you tell me these really do taste fudge-like, I am now going to give this a go! I actually have an entire bag of dates (was planning to make sticky date pudding) so I am tempted to try this right now!
Helen says
Haha … actually this is the first time I’ve been tempted by something like this. I had to add chocolate and orange before I’d give them a go! So how did your attempt go? I really hope they actually did taste fudgy now that I’ve said so! I decided today that they also taste a bit like Christmas cake .. I guess it’s the raisins that does it. Anyway, so glad you liked these enough to give them a go! 🙂
Culinary Ginger says
Chocolate and orange, one of the best flavor combos and I love dates, i eat them everyday so I should probably make these 🙂
Helen says
Hi, Janette! Really, you eat dates every day? Oh, well you absolutely must try these, then! I suspect you’ll love them!
Chris @ Shared Appetite says
How have you never seen Seinfeld before?!?! It’s SUCH a classic! Re-runs play here on pretty much all the channels all the time. So glad you have finally been introduced to Jerry, Elaine, George, and Kramer!
And these bars… they look awesome! I’m such a fan of chocolate and orange together… such a great combo!
Helen says
I know … I’ve been totally Seinfeld ‘head in the sand’ deprived! Got to make up for lost time now!
So glad you like the bars, too … I’m addicted at the moment!
Dannii @ Hungry Healthy Happy says
I make something very similar, although I put coconut oil in mine and they are SO good, aren’t they. A nice healthy snack.
Helen says
Hi, Dannii! Yes, these are so yummy! Mine actually taste as if they’ve got oil or butter in, but they haven’t … although I say it myself, I was so impressed with myself because of that. Ha!
So glad you like these .. I will have to come over and check out your version, too!
JayanthiSindhiya says
Wow this sounds interesting,Iam having all the stuff u have mentioned and Iam going to try now,thanks.
Helen says
Hello and thanks for passing by! Hope you like these as much as I did!
Julie | This Gal Cooks says
I used to watch Seinfeld when I was younger and it was on syndicated TV (I think it still is). I like the show but it wasn’t a show that I ever felt OMG I have to watch this ALL the time! But it is funny!
Now I need to get these bars in my life stat. Especially with all of the junk I’ve been eating lately. My body feels like a wreck and I think I’m becoming addicted to sugar and carbs. Yuck! Love this recipe, Helen!
Helen says
I think we’ve just got into the habit of switching on an episode while eating. It helps that the episodes are only about 20 mins long, I guess. I know I’m about 20 years late with getting into this, but … oh well! Classic comedy!
Definitely get something like these bars into your life, Julie. Makes me feel OK about eating sweet chocolaty stuff!
[email protected] Olives & Garlic says
Wow Helen I can just imagine the flavor combination. I adore chocolate and orange together. It’s been a while since I’ve last watched Seinfeld but every so often I remember the lines from an episode. 🙂
Helen says
seems like the kind of show that it’s easy to remember the lines from! Glad you like the choc-orange combo. It’s my fave, too!